Holy crap.
Jun. 9th, 2007 02:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sabinetzinTitle: Special Delivery
Summary: Booster has a brilliant idea.
Fandom: DC
Word Count: 958
Rating/Warnings: PG, slight AU, WAFF, Rip Hunter as a deus ex machina, mpreg (I'm as shocked as you are)
Pairing: Booster Gold/Blue Beetle
A/N: For![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
wtf27 Prompt 6. Sequel to To Have and To Hold. Well, I think if I write a high school AU, I will have broken every taboo known to fanfiction. God help us all. Cross-posted to boostle.
It was not a peaceful night in the Carter-Kord household.
"I don't want to talk about this again," Ted sighed as he climbed into bed.
"You can't keep ignoring what you know you want," Booster countered from the bathroom.
"What I want and what's going to happen are two different things."
"What about a surrogate?"
"Booster, all the women we know are superheroes."
"That's not true."
"You're right. Some of them are supervillains."
"We could always adopt," Booster offered.
"I can't even get insurance," Ted pointed out. "You think they're gonna give me a baby?" He shook his head, a little sadly. "Barring babies left on our doorstep, I just don't think it's going to happen."
Booster turned off the light and got into bed. "I'll think of something."
"Don't hurt yourself," Ted deadpanned, kissing his husband on the head and rolling over to sleep.
--
It was Sue who found him, swearing violently at the small white thing in his hand.
"Other people need to use the bathroom, too, you know," she told him, startling him.
"What does two lines mean?" Booster asked desperately, all but shaking her.
"Two lines?" she repeated, before realizing what he was holding. "Booster, if this is some kind of weird joke-" Seeing the pitiful expression on his face (something like a puppy left out in the rain), she stopped. Not knowing what kind of crazy person it was her job to deal with today, she picked up the box. "See? Right here? Here's a little chart," she told him soothingly. "Two lines means you're pregnant." She didn't really register what she had said until after she had said it, but by then Booster was already out the door.
Hearing shouts of jubilation, Ralph stretched his head around the corner. "What was that all about?"
Sue stared after Booster. "I have absolutely no idea."
--
The Blue Beetle was in the second hour of a very boring stakeout, wishing very much that he had brought a deck of cards, or perhaps a sandwich. He turned at the sound of footsteps to find that his teammate, Captain Atom had joined him. Beetle waved for Atom to join him on his uncomfortable perch.
"Watching for bad guys?"
"Art thieves."
"Good night for it."
"Yeah."
"So." Beetle looked at him expectantly. "Congratulations on knocking Booster up," Atom finally blurted.
"Thank you?" Beetle responded, nonplussed.
"I think it's… nice, and not creepy and gross at all."
"Have- have you been drinking?" Beetle finally asked.
Atom squinted at him. "You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?"
"Hey, you're the one who came up here talking a bunch of nonsense," Beetle told him. "I was just trying to play along."
"You know what? You should go back to headquarters. I got this one."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Just… just go."
Beetle shrugged. "I owe you one."
--
"YOU DID WHAT?!"
"See, Rip has this bad habit of not locking up his time machine, only I guess it's not really a bad habit, since he knows I'm going to use it anyway, since he's all unstuck in time and everything-"
"Come on, Ted. Sit down on the nice, comfy chair-"
"Cram it, Marvel!"
"And this procedure was- will be- exists-"
"I just want you to know that if he has a heart attack on my floor, the HMO won't cover it. That's a pre-existing condition."
"And so I went and had it done, which took several months, I might add-"
"M'lord Gardner wishes it to be known that he will be in the nearest cantina until the child has reached the age of majority."
Finally entering the fray, J'onn pushed his way to Ted. "Compose yourself," he said, quieting his mind telepathically. "I will mediate. Your presence is not needed," he told the others. With much hemming and hawing, they trickled out of the room, Max leading the rear.
As soon as they were gone, Ted started in. "I can't believe you would do something so irresponsible and dangerous- no, wait, yes I can. I find that perfectly believable."
"If I had known you were going to be so ungrateful-"
"Ungrateful? You- You-" Ted made a noise of incoherent rage, and J'onn gave him a warning look.
"Yeah, ungrateful! I went through all kinds of hell, traveled through time, spent months without you-"
"You spent months away from me, I've been right here-"
"I only did it to make you happy."
Ted stopped short, sighing. "That's not fair. You can't get your emotional manipulation mixed up in my righteous anger."
"Yeah, well, you got your righteous anger in my emotional manipulation."
Ted smiled, despite himself. "You're a reckless idiot."
"That's no way to talk to the mother of your child," Booster replied with a grin.
"Are you really sure we should do this?"
"Hey, unless you know any male abortion clinics or time travelers who aren't pissed at me for stealing their stuff, we're doing this."
"We're going to have a hell of a time getting a birth certificate."
"Eh, we'll just get Max to forge some documents. It'll make him feel useful."
"I heard that!" Max called from just outside the doorway.
"Shhh! He'll know we're eavesdropping!" Mary whispered loudly.
Ted rolled his eyes, and they quietly snuck out through the other door.
--
"It's a boy," the harried looking nurse told Ted, "apparently."
"So much for Emily Michelle," Booster said lightly.
"I'm happy as long as we don’t call him Jarvis," Ted replied.
"There's always Theodore Michael."
Ted pulled a face. "No, there isn't."
"Jon?" Booster tried.
"Only if it's short for Jonathan."
"Cancel the Ativan," she said, looking back over her shoulder at the still-arguing couple. "And look up the number for the National Inquisitor."
Summary: Booster has a brilliant idea.
Fandom: DC
Word Count: 958
Rating/Warnings: PG, slight AU, WAFF, Rip Hunter as a deus ex machina, mpreg (I'm as shocked as you are)
Pairing: Booster Gold/Blue Beetle
A/N: For
wtf27 Prompt 6. Sequel to To Have and To Hold. Well, I think if I write a high school AU, I will have broken every taboo known to fanfiction. God help us all. Cross-posted to boostle.It was not a peaceful night in the Carter-Kord household.
"I don't want to talk about this again," Ted sighed as he climbed into bed.
"You can't keep ignoring what you know you want," Booster countered from the bathroom.
"What I want and what's going to happen are two different things."
"What about a surrogate?"
"Booster, all the women we know are superheroes."
"That's not true."
"You're right. Some of them are supervillains."
"We could always adopt," Booster offered.
"I can't even get insurance," Ted pointed out. "You think they're gonna give me a baby?" He shook his head, a little sadly. "Barring babies left on our doorstep, I just don't think it's going to happen."
Booster turned off the light and got into bed. "I'll think of something."
"Don't hurt yourself," Ted deadpanned, kissing his husband on the head and rolling over to sleep.
--
It was Sue who found him, swearing violently at the small white thing in his hand.
"Other people need to use the bathroom, too, you know," she told him, startling him.
"What does two lines mean?" Booster asked desperately, all but shaking her.
"Two lines?" she repeated, before realizing what he was holding. "Booster, if this is some kind of weird joke-" Seeing the pitiful expression on his face (something like a puppy left out in the rain), she stopped. Not knowing what kind of crazy person it was her job to deal with today, she picked up the box. "See? Right here? Here's a little chart," she told him soothingly. "Two lines means you're pregnant." She didn't really register what she had said until after she had said it, but by then Booster was already out the door.
Hearing shouts of jubilation, Ralph stretched his head around the corner. "What was that all about?"
Sue stared after Booster. "I have absolutely no idea."
--
The Blue Beetle was in the second hour of a very boring stakeout, wishing very much that he had brought a deck of cards, or perhaps a sandwich. He turned at the sound of footsteps to find that his teammate, Captain Atom had joined him. Beetle waved for Atom to join him on his uncomfortable perch.
"Watching for bad guys?"
"Art thieves."
"Good night for it."
"Yeah."
"So." Beetle looked at him expectantly. "Congratulations on knocking Booster up," Atom finally blurted.
"Thank you?" Beetle responded, nonplussed.
"I think it's… nice, and not creepy and gross at all."
"Have- have you been drinking?" Beetle finally asked.
Atom squinted at him. "You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?"
"Hey, you're the one who came up here talking a bunch of nonsense," Beetle told him. "I was just trying to play along."
"You know what? You should go back to headquarters. I got this one."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Just… just go."
Beetle shrugged. "I owe you one."
--
"YOU DID WHAT?!"
"See, Rip has this bad habit of not locking up his time machine, only I guess it's not really a bad habit, since he knows I'm going to use it anyway, since he's all unstuck in time and everything-"
"Come on, Ted. Sit down on the nice, comfy chair-"
"Cram it, Marvel!"
"And this procedure was- will be- exists-"
"I just want you to know that if he has a heart attack on my floor, the HMO won't cover it. That's a pre-existing condition."
"And so I went and had it done, which took several months, I might add-"
"M'lord Gardner wishes it to be known that he will be in the nearest cantina until the child has reached the age of majority."
Finally entering the fray, J'onn pushed his way to Ted. "Compose yourself," he said, quieting his mind telepathically. "I will mediate. Your presence is not needed," he told the others. With much hemming and hawing, they trickled out of the room, Max leading the rear.
As soon as they were gone, Ted started in. "I can't believe you would do something so irresponsible and dangerous- no, wait, yes I can. I find that perfectly believable."
"If I had known you were going to be so ungrateful-"
"Ungrateful? You- You-" Ted made a noise of incoherent rage, and J'onn gave him a warning look.
"Yeah, ungrateful! I went through all kinds of hell, traveled through time, spent months without you-"
"You spent months away from me, I've been right here-"
"I only did it to make you happy."
Ted stopped short, sighing. "That's not fair. You can't get your emotional manipulation mixed up in my righteous anger."
"Yeah, well, you got your righteous anger in my emotional manipulation."
Ted smiled, despite himself. "You're a reckless idiot."
"That's no way to talk to the mother of your child," Booster replied with a grin.
"Are you really sure we should do this?"
"Hey, unless you know any male abortion clinics or time travelers who aren't pissed at me for stealing their stuff, we're doing this."
"We're going to have a hell of a time getting a birth certificate."
"Eh, we'll just get Max to forge some documents. It'll make him feel useful."
"I heard that!" Max called from just outside the doorway.
"Shhh! He'll know we're eavesdropping!" Mary whispered loudly.
Ted rolled his eyes, and they quietly snuck out through the other door.
--
"It's a boy," the harried looking nurse told Ted, "apparently."
"So much for Emily Michelle," Booster said lightly.
"I'm happy as long as we don’t call him Jarvis," Ted replied.
"There's always Theodore Michael."
Ted pulled a face. "No, there isn't."
"Jon?" Booster tried.
"Only if it's short for Jonathan."
"Cancel the Ativan," she said, looking back over her shoulder at the still-arguing couple. "And look up the number for the National Inquisitor."
